By Alexander Samuels
Now before you accuse me of attacking this bastion of free speech, please take a moment to read what I have to say. Quite frankly, I don't like bumper stickers. They are usually too messy to get off the car when I am tired of them.
I realize, however, that many of you like to . . . put bumper stickers on your cars because I see so many of them as I travel around town. Freedom of speech aside, don't you think there ought to be rules of etiquette for anyone putting a bumper sticker on his or her car?
- Don't apply so many bumper stickers to your car that they all can't be read while someone is sitting behind you at a stoplight.
- All political bumper stickers should be removed within one month after an election. I'm tired of still seeing Bush/Cheney and Kerry/Edwards bumper stickers on cars. The election is over.
- Take your bumper sticker off your car if the ink has worn off.
- Christians: The fish swims to your left when you put it on, not to the right.
- Don't you hear enough profanity from TV, movies or the people around you? Do you have to display a bumper sticker that uses profanity, too?
- If you support a social, political or environmental cause, you only need one bumper sticker to state your case. People will get the point.
- When selecting a bumper sticker, make sure the print is large enough for others to read it.
- Use bumper stickers wisely. There is enough road rage as it is.
If you have any ideas for further suggestions, please feel free to add them in our "comments" section.